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cryo report and peeing on sticks

Posted in and this is where it started to go downhill, cryo report, IVF#2 (Take 3) on June 8, 2009| 13 Comments »

I know it will shock you all to hear this, but… none of my little buggers made it to the freezer.

I’m … well, I suppose on one level I am upset that I can’t seem to make decent embryos (though I do know that my clinic has really high standards for freezing embryos). But on the other hand, I’m incredibly relieved that I’m not being faced with a $1300 cryopreservation bill that I really don’t have the money for right now.

Well, you know? I suppose there’s always the possibility that George, Jr. will just stick around and this will all be a moot point, right?

Um. Yeah.

My buddy Barren asked when I start peeing on sticks. I hope I don’t. I’m just not sure I can deal with the neurosis, the hope, the devastation, the rationalizing, the maybes (maybe it’s too early, maybe it’s a dud stick, maybe I should try another brand, maybe, maybe, maybe).

I’m sure I’ll cave. I have, after all, a pile of the internet EPTs in the bathroom cabinet. How could a girl truly resist?

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Nothing to See Here, Move Along, Move Along

Posted in 2ww, cryo report, POAS on February 11, 2009| 6 Comments »

Finally heard back from SuperNurse. She didn’t realize I hadn’t gotten a call over the weekend (and apparently hadn’t gotten to my email from yesterday). So all is forgiven and she has been re-established in my book of people who are allowed to have snickerdoodles next week. Maybe. You’ll see why she may have fallen back out of status later.

Anywhozit, there was nothing to freeze. Everything tanked. Shocker. I know this is not an indication of whether George is resilient enough to have parked his little butt in place for the long haul, but it does give one pause, no?

.
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Right. Well, I think that was enough of a pause. Anyway, it doesn’t mean a darned thing. My clinic has some pretty strict standards for freezing, and I’m cool with that. A lot of clinics would have frozen right then and there when they transferred George.

My nurse wasn’t worried that there was nothing to freeze, “because the six they transferred were real beauties, so I’m sure you’re going to have a positive beta next week.”

*blink*

Yeah, you read that right. SO not funny. She may *think* she’s funny, but she’s not.

I told her I was just proud of myself for not having peed on any sticks yet. “NO! DON’T PEE ON ANY STICKS!” she shouted through the phone!
“Oh for crying out loud, SuperNurse! I just told you I haven’t! And I don’t understand why you people get all ridiculous about not letting us pee on sticks – it’s not going to change the result. Either I’m going to be pregnant on the 18th when I come in for my beta or I’m not – it’s not like peeing on a stick will change that.”
“Yeah, but then you get a stick that tells you you’re pregnant, and then we have to tell you you’re not, and then…”
“Well that doesn’t change anything for me! I don’t get all weird about it! Hello? I’M totally rational, you know me!”
“Well then by all means! Pee on all the sticks you want! Go buy a box of popsicle sticks if you want! Whatever makes you happy!”

If it weren’t for that remark about the six transferred – she’d TOTALLY be on my cookie list right now.

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It's for the sake of Shalom Bayis, after all!

Posted in 2ww, blithering, cryo report on February 10, 2009| 3 Comments »

I found an excuse to bug my nurse for the cryo report. For the sake of shalom bayis I must know the disposition of those struggling little blastocysts! Honest! For those of you who don’t want to click on the link, shalom bayis is literally “peace in the home” – it is the concept of peace and harmony in the household and good relations between husband and wife. In this case, I realized that if there was anything to freeze (again, I think not), then I’m likely to get nailed with ~$1500 bill for freezing and storage (it’s a little less, but just go with me, okay? And actually, it it was just one, it’s significantly less). A girl’s gotta prepare her husband for a bill like that, right?

So, for the sake of domestic tranquility, I emailed SuperNurse and said, you know, I hate to be nosy and all, but does she know the disposition of my struggling little life forms? And really, she wouldn’t want our marriage to be in jeopardy, right? It’s for the sake of our marriage! Plus, after all, enquiring minds want to know! This is front page news! Sort of.

Okay, not remotely, but I’m sure all of you are clamoring to know. Right? RIGHT?

Ahem. All righty then. So it’s just ME that wants to know. Yet another way for me to pass the time. The endless, boring time stretched before me. Another eight, looooooooong days before my beta. With nothing to do but sit here and ~~whine~~, ~~complain~~, ~~bitch~~, blither to you about the mundanity of life when there is absolutely nothing interesting going on in my life. Absolutely nothing worth blogging about.

Nothing to see here, move along. Move along.

Oh! Hey! If there was *nothing* to freeze, maybe I can convince the man that since he just saved $1500 buckeroos, he should take me out to dinner next week to celebrate! Or, um, to console me in my um, sadness. That’s right. Because I’ll be all sad that we won’t have anything to save and therefore won’t have to pay out of pocket for freezing, storage and FETs that the insurance won’t cover… Yeah. Sad. That’s right.

(ooh! And Score! I totally bought a pile of HPTs. They should arrive on my doorstep tomorrow or the next day! They aren’t my beloved FRER’s, but I’m a girl on a budget now. And this should support my habit for at least a little while, right? Just, um, don’t tell my husband, okay? Oh for crying out loud, honey, they cost LESS THAN A DOLLAR EACH! And, no, I did not buy 300 of them. Just 297… KIDDING!)

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