ChezPerky

Feeling frustrated, whiny, overwhelmed, and unsure of myself lately. Tired of being called supermom because I’m not sure I’m living up to the expectation anymore. I’m not even sure how to write about what’s going on. I feel like I really need to buy this magnet, though:

Story of my life, the damn thing is sold out.

This week is going to be hell. H – E – Double – Hockey – Sticks – HELL.

Yesterday wasn’t so bad, just the usual, get up, feed babies, feed more babies, get dressed, change diapers, fight with J to get him dressed and ready to go, go to work (Seth took J to school), work all day, pick up J from school, go home, feed babies, while trying to make J dinner, fight with J to eat dinner, juggle three screaming babies, feed three babies again (they eat a small amount of solid food for dinner, but if I want them to actually SLEEP at night for any length of time, they also have to be nursed/have a bottle afterward… they aren’t to the point where solid food is REPLACING milk as food, they just won’t take enough in yet), put three babies to bed, try to calm J down, coordinate with Seth (who has now arrived home) to get J fed (because he wouldn’t eat when it was just me juggling all four kids), coordinate with babysitter to get her to my house (she’s now called four times for directions), skip board meeting I’m supposed to be at because J is going ape-shit and I can’t leave him with babysitter for that long, run two errands closer to home than board meeting, come home, fight with J to get him into bed, check email, do some work, pump milk, make bottles for nanny tomorrow, find preemie clothes for friend who just delivered triplets, make sure all preemie clothes are labeled with my name, re-pack preemie clothes into box, put box in Seth’s car (she delivered at the hospital where he works), feed a baby who woke up, wash bottle, collapse in bed kind of day. You know, that kind of day, not too bad.

Tonight my friend Connie was going to come over after the triplets’ bedtime to watch J so Seth and I could relax and go to a movie for the first time in over a year. Not like Connie doesn’t have enough to do on her own, seeing as how she’s got TRIPLETS OF HER OWN. But she’s awesome, and she offered, and she repeated the offer, and then she repeated it again, so I figured she was serious, and we took her up on it. But then as I was thinking of the week ahead, I realized how stressed out I was getting over the logistics of going out tonight that I told her tonight wasn’t a good night for it. Because, really? If I’m getting more stressed out over a relaxing night out than staying in… it kind of defeats the purpose right?

I’m almost out of baby food in my freezer, which would be fine, because it’s easy enough to whip up a few batches of baby food, except that it’s impossible to do that if you have no ingredients with which to do so in your house. Whoops. So I need to buy chicken and fruit and vegetables. But WHEN? HOW? I was supposed to do that yesterday, but couldn’t because there was no time after I picked up J without being late for relieving the nanny. Then, in theory, I was supposed to go to a board meeting, though I ended up bailing on that anyway, but grocery shopping didn’t happen either because there was too much else going on and J couldn’t be left with the babysitter for too long because he’s just been completely crazy lately. You’d think something as simple as grocery shopping would be easy, wouldn’t you? Hah!

Tomorrow, Seth is leaving for Texas at 5pm, which means he won’t be home after work. Fortunately, my mother is picking J up from school, which buys me a little bit of time, but this means I have to get home, feed babies, clean them up, get J dinner (oh wait, my mother will probably feed J, phew!), feed babies again (see aforementioned note re: solids vs. milk at dinner time), get babies to bed, get J calmed down for bed, get J INTO bed, get J’s lunch made for school the next day (do we even HAVE food in the house for his lunch??), pump, make bottles for the nanny, sleep?, get up with whatever babies wake up in the middle of the night (usually Sam and Abby, hopefully just Abby), and then get up in the morning, feed three babies, get showered (hah!), dressed, get J dressed (this is ALWAYS a fight), get J off to school (once the nanny arrives), get to work and breathe for a minute.

Then Thursday afternoon, I have to leave work early, pick up Sam, take him to the ophthalmologist (and I have to remember to pack some snacks for me and for him, because this appointment could take up to two hours, hooray!). My MIL is picking J up from school, thankfully, so that takes one thing off my plate. I have to rush home from the ophthalmologist to relieve the nanny (I’ll probably be late, but the nanny already knows that. Feed babies. Clean them up. Feed them milk. Change them, get them in PJs, put them to bed. Feed J, bathe him (hey, I forgot that part the last two nights, didn’t I?), get him in PJs, fight with him about bed, pray that he goes to bed, explain to him that YES Abba WILL be home by the time he wakes up! and hopefully he’ll go to sleep at some point.

Then I get to start making dinner for Friday night (and WHEN exactly did I go grocery shopping for Friday’s dinner?), I’ll have to pump, do some straightening so that my cleaning lady (yes, I’m a spoiled brat and I have a cleaning lady) can actually CLEAN
when she arrives on Friday, make bottles for the nanny the next day, probably have to feed Abby at some point (she usually wakes up around 10 or 11pm), and go to bed. Seth’s plane arrives after midnight, so I don’t expect him home until 1am-ish and I have no intention of waiting up for him.

Friday J has an appointment with a developmental pediatrician, so at least we don’t have to be prepared to take him to school first thing in the morning. And at least Seth’s taking him to that appointment. I’ll just have to get up, feed a baby, feed another baby, get showered, get dressed, get to work, work all day, come home feed three babies, feed them again (see aforementioned note on solids vs. milk dinner feeding…)…

Oh yes, it’s going to be a FUN week.

And yet, people STILL tell me I should sleep when my babies sleep. Please, someone, explain to me exactly how I’m supposed to make that happen! Because for the life of me, I’m STILL trying to figure out exactly when I’m making it to the grocery store this week, which I desperately need to do (nevermind how I’m going to PAY for the groceries…right now it’s only about the logistics of GETTING to the grocery store!).

Normally, I’m very, very good at keeping everything together. I don’t get stressed out. I don’t get overwhelmed. I handle things with grace and ease, MOST of the time. But right now? THIS week? I think I’ve hit my limit.

Still to write:

• What’s been going on with J
• Early Intervention Evaluation for the Triplets
• Lots o’ pictures to post (who has TIME?)
• Fun with Jessica (TWO weeks in a ROW! What a treat!)
• Milestones (Babies are ALMOST mobile…Gah!!)

But seriously? When is all this writing supposed to happen?

See? I warned you that I was feeling whiny. But did you listen? NO! That being said, if you made it all the way to the end of this post, you get a cookie. Not that I have the time to make you cookies, or anything, so you’ll have to make your own. Or buy your own. Or just use your imagination and dream of your own cookie. So here’s your virtual cookie. Because hello? I’m a mother of FOUR children. Did you REALLY think I have time to bake you cookies??

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Feeling frustrated, whiny, overwhelmed, and unsure of myself lately. Tired of being called supermom because I'm not sure I'm living up to the expectation anymore. I'm not even sure how to write about what's going on. I feel like I really need to buy this magnet, though:

Story of my life, the damn thing is sold out.

This week is going to be hell. H – E – Double – Hockey – Sticks – HELL.

Yesterday wasn't so bad, just the usual, get up, feed babies, feed more babies, get dressed, change diapers, fight with J to get him dressed and ready to go, go to work (Seth took J to school), work all day, pick up J from school, go home, feed babies, while trying to make J dinner, fight with J to eat dinner, juggle three screaming babies, feed three babies again (they eat a small amount of solid food for dinner, but if I want them to actually SLEEP at night for any length of time, they also have to be nursed/have a bottle afterward… they aren't to the point where solid food is REPLACING milk as food, they just won't take enough in yet), put three babies to bed, try to calm J down, coordinate with Seth (who has now arrived home) to get J fed (because he wouldn't eat when it was just me juggling all four kids), coordinate with babysitter to get her to my house (she's now called four times for directions), skip board meeting I'm supposed to be at because J is going ape-shit and I can't leave him with babysitter for that long, run two errands closer to home than board meeting, come home, fight with J to get him into bed, check email, do some work, pump milk, make bottles for nanny tomorrow, find preemie clothes for friend who just delivered triplets, make sure all preemie clothes are labeled with my name, re-pack preemie clothes into box, put box in Seth's car (she delivered at the hospital where he works), feed a baby who woke up, wash bottle, collapse in bed kind of day. You know, that kind of day, not too bad.

Tonight my friend Connie was going to come over after the triplets' bedtime to watch J so Seth and I could relax and go to a movie for the first time in over a year. Not like Connie doesn't have enough to do on her own, seeing as how she's got TRIPLETS OF HER OWN. But she's awesome, and she offered, and she repeated the offer, and then she repeated it again, so I figured she was serious, and we took her up on it. But then as I was thinking of the week ahead, I realized how stressed out I was getting over the logistics of going out tonight that I told her tonight wasn't a good night for it. Because, really? If I'm getting more stressed out over a relaxing night out than staying in… it kind of defeats the purpose right?

I'm almost out of baby food in my freezer, which would be fine, because it's easy enough to whip up a few batches of baby food, except that it's impossible to do that if you have no ingredients with which to do so in your house. Whoops. So I need to buy chicken and fruit and vegetables. But WHEN? HOW? I was supposed to do that yesterday, but couldn't because there was no time after I picked up J without being late for relieving the nanny. Then, in theory, I was supposed to go to a board meeting, though I ended up bailing on that anyway, but grocery shopping didn't happen either because there was too much else going on and J couldn't be left with the babysitter for too long because he's just been completely crazy lately. You'd think something as simple as grocery shopping would be easy, wouldn't you? Hah!

Tomorrow, Seth is leaving for Texas at 5pm, which means he won't be home after work. Fortunately, my mother is picking J up from school, which buys me a little bit of time, but this means I have to get home, feed babies, clean them up, get J dinner (oh wait, my mother will probably feed J, phew!), feed babies again (see aforementioned note re: solids vs. milk at dinner time), get babies to bed, get J calmed down for bed, get J INTO bed, get J's lunch made for school the next day (do we even HAVE food in the house for his lunch??), pump, make bottles for the nanny, sleep?, get up with whatever babies wake up in the middle of the night (usually Sam and Abby, hopefully just Abby), and then get up in the morning, feed three babies, get showered (hah!), dressed, get J dressed (this is ALWAYS a fight), get J off to school (once the nanny arrives), get to work and breathe for a minute.

Then Thursday afternoon, I have to leave work early, pick up Sam, take him to the ophthalmologist (and I have to remember to pack some snacks for me and for him, because this appointment could take up to two hours, hooray!). My MIL is picking J up from school, thankfully, so that takes one thing off my plate. I have to rush home from the ophthalmologist to relieve the nanny (I'll probably be late, but the nanny already knows that. Feed babies. Clean them up. Feed them milk. Change them, get them in PJs, put them to bed. Feed J, bathe him (hey, I forgot that part the last two nights, didn't I?), get him in PJs, fight with him about bed, pray that he goes to bed, explain to him that YES Abba WILL be home by the time he wakes up! and hopefully he'll go to sleep at some point.

Then I get to start making dinner for Friday night (and WHEN exactly did I go grocery shopping for Friday's dinner?), I'll have to pump, do some straightening so that my cleaning lady (yes, I'm a spoiled brat and I have a cleaning lady) can actually CLEAN
when she arrives on Friday, make bottles for the nanny the next day, probably have to feed Abby at some point (she usually wakes up around 10 or 11pm), and go to bed. Seth's plane arrives after midnight, so I don't expect him home until 1am-ish and I have no intention of waiting up for him.

Friday J has an appointment with a developmental pediatrician, so at least we don't have to be prepared to take him to school first thing in the morning. And at least Seth's taking him to that appointment. I'll just have to get up, feed a baby, feed another baby, get showered, get dressed, get to work, work all day, come home feed three babies, feed them again (see aforementioned note on solids vs. milk dinner feeding…)…

Oh yes, it's going to be a FUN week.

And yet, people STILL tell me I should sleep when my babies sleep. Please, someone, explain to me exactly how I'm supposed to make that happen! Because for the life of me, I'm STILL trying to figure out exactly when I'm making it to the grocery store this week, which I desperately need to do (nevermind how I'm going to PAY for the groceries…right now it's only about the logistics of GETTING to the grocery store!).

Normally, I'm very, very good at keeping everything together. I don't get stressed out. I don't get overwhelmed. I handle things with grace and ease, MOST of the time. But right now? THIS week? I think I've hit my limit.

Still to write:

• What's been going on with J
• Early Intervention Evaluation for the Triplets
• Lots o' pictures to post (who has TIME?)
• Fun with Jessica (TWO weeks in a ROW! What a treat!)
• Milestones (Babies are ALMOST mobile…Gah!!)

But seriously? When is all this writing supposed to happen?

See? I warned you that I was feeling whiny. But did you listen? NO! That being said, if you made it all the way to the end of this post, you get a cookie. Not that
I have the time to make you cookies, or anything, so you'll have to make your own. Or buy your own. Or just use your imagination and dream of your own cookie. So here's your virtual cookie. Because hello? I'm a mother of FOUR children. Did you REALLY think I have time to bake you cookies??

Read Full Post »